Crisco number two, Stinky Crisco and Buttered Lightbulbs

By: Agent Dalton and Sponge Bob Cow Pants

Rated: PG13

Classification: Humor

Spoilers: Requiem, maybe

Archive: YEAH, just keep our header on it.

Summary: Scully now works as a cheese clerk. She also goes to a family reunion at the 
food mart(you need to read the first story first, to understand things in here)

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, we don’t own Mulder, Scully, and the others. We don’t sell 
biscuits either. Mulder and Scully and their buddies belong to FOX, CC, and the  “I made 
this” people. If we owned them there would be no need for shippy fanfic.

Feedback: Come on, people. We need feedback to keep this series going! Keep in mind we 
are only in 7th and 8th grade.

Authors’ notes at bottom.
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Scully got fired from her daycare job, because all the kids were copying the people on the 
NC-17 movie that she dropped them off at. She then found the job of being the cheese clerk 
at the local biscuit shop.

When Scully got to work, she went to get the cheese out of the cupboards. It was moldy. 
She missed Muldy, he was still gone. 

She was jealous of the keyboard, he always got all of the good cheese. She had to look at 
all of the moldy ones, and the keyboard got Chez Wiz, cheese flies, cheese fleas, cheesed 
geese, and buttercakes. They were homemade.

MEANWHILE...
Crisco was working on resurrecting himself. He was recreating himself by sniffing the 
bowling shoes. The stench made him Stinky Crisco. 

He found Scully’s granny clasper on the ground, she must have dropped it when she was 
spreading him on the bowling alley. 

BACK TO SCULLY
When Scully was finishing her cheese job, she was thinking about going back to the camel 
lot. She wanted to find her long lost sister again.

When she got to the camel lot, she saw another strange shaped camel. She knew it was her 
sister at once, the only problem was that all of the camels looked like her sister! She 
shot them all in the head, and in the butt for kicks and giggles (again!)

Then the pope popped up and said, “Never use joker cards in war. The CANT beat everything.

Stinky Crisco then came scampering in, with the Buttered Lightbulb Clan at his tail. They 
took all of the camel’s panty hose. They were on a panty hose mission this time.

The Buttered Lightbulbs’ lips were sealed. The wouldn’t tell anyone about the calculator 
button, and the bindings on the window.

Scully watched the whole scene while shuffling a deck of cards. 

After Stinky Crisco and the Buttered Lightbulbs left, Scully experimented taping her 
fingers together. She also practiced putting paste on her face.

END OF SCENE ONE

Scully went back to her home in cheesy lane. Her underpants were getting kind of wedgied, 
so she un-wedgied them. Then she looked in her room she saw her sister, how could her 
sister be here? She was dead. Camels just cant come back to life. She was wearing lipstick 
too.

Her sister was in the bed with Mariah Carey, and a daycare kid. They were fooling around 
with each others noses. They were giggling very loudly.

Scully then went into the bathroom and barfed, and then watched Dances With 
Wolves. When she was down, she could aways watch those little hottie indians dance.

While she was watching it, she decided her toenails needed a real clipping. She turned off 
Dances With Wolves, and got the lawnmower. Bubble Wrap was already using the lawn mower. 
Scully was furious, but she decided not to shoot Bubble Wrap, because it was so cute.

Scully went back into her apartment, and turned on the garbage disposal. She cut her 
toenails in that.

When she was done cutting her toenails, she turned on The Little Mermaid. Flounder reminded 
her of Muldy. 

Then she challenged the ketchup bottle to a game of Pokemon. The ketchup won, and it was 
a high stakes game. They bet their socks for tomorrow’s gathering. 

Mother Theresa and the Pope popped up and said, “Animal Crackers at my place, all you 
party animals!”

END OF SCENE TWO

When Scully was checking her mail, she had an invitation to a family reunion. It said to 
be at the Food Mart in exactly three hours.

Scully didn’t want to go, because she thought her sister might be there. You never know 
with those camels. But after 3 seconds of debating, she decided to go. The produce section 
was her most favorite place in the world.

After two hours of deciding what to wear, she finally decided on a natural bathing suit. 
It was made out of whipped cream, leaves, and grass seeds. Don’t forget two grapes and 
orange peelings.

She got in her new Jaguar that was a BMW and a Honda. She tried not to get a raccoon in her 
muffler, but she couldn’t help it. Those coons were little rascals.

When she got to the food market, she stepped out of her car and found a fruit bowl. She 
put it on around her neck.

She walked up to the food mart, and the doors opened by themselves. Scully was horrified! 
She had never seen such a thing, how did the open all by themselves? (She had never been 
to the food mart before)

After she got over that shock, she continued in. She found the produce section and looked 
for her mother. She found a nice looking cucumber and said, “Hello mom”. She never 
remembered her mother being green, but hey, you never know.

She gave her mother a bicycle tire for her birthday, even though it wasn’t her birthday. 
It was father’s day.

 She went to look for Bill, her younger sister. (Not the camel) She went to Band-Aid 
 section and found a nice little box of Power Ranger Band-Aids. She said, “Hello Bill” 
 and talked to her for five minutes about how cheese is biodegradable, and how your hair 
 is dead, but it really grows. 

Then she went to look for her father named Agnes. She headed off to the toilet paper 
section and found a nice roll of fluffy toilet paper. “Hello Agnes, how are you doing, 
daddy?” Her daddy was speechless. 

She figured he must just be very shocked.

Then they all gathered in a circle and sang Koombiya, but she realized that she was the 
only one holding hands, and she was the only one singing. How terrible!

She went back to her home and saw her sister. She asked her why she didn’t sing. Her sister 
said that she had cucumber stuck in her hair. 

Scully then got in her brand new (very expensive) Honda and drove to the Philippine 
Islands.

As for Stinky Crisco, he was too busy watching Dances with Wolves.

The pope popped up and said, “Wicker Chair”

END

Authors’ notes

We are thinking of making this into a series. We just need lots of feedback. Once we get 
enough feedback we will sit down for a few hours and write ya’ll another installment.

If you would like to archive our stuff, Email Cello6909@aol.com and I will send you our 
next installments via email.

FRUIT BOWLS

Sorrie fore anie mispaled werds

Ok, bye

Feedback. Send it. Cello6909@aol.com